The Way I Am
by surferscout
Summary: Miley wants to tell Lilly she’s Hannah Montana, but Lilly has a secret of her own. Liley.
1. one

A/N- I'm pretty sure this is gonna be a story with 2 or more chapters. Love it? Hate it? Read and review it! I'll update soon! -xoxo, s

"Lilly?"

Miley ran her fingers through her light brown hair. She had been preparing for this moment for weeks—no, months—and she wasn't about to screw it up. Her mind was made up to tell Lilly her secret, even if it meant losing her best friend.

"Yeah, Miles?" Lilly was sitting on a stool in the Stewarts' kitchen. She, too, had resolved to tell Miley a secret. She knew that it could endanger or even end their friendship, but even that was better than living a lie.

"I have something to tell you." Miley wasted no time. She knew that if she avoided telling Lilly bluntly, her courage would be gone within minutes. Miley took both of Lilly's hands and led her to the couch. They sat close together.

"Miley, wait. I-I have something to tell you too." Lilly's light blue eyes were beginning to turn red around the edges, and Miley could tell that she was holding back tears.

"I'll go first." Miley reached into her bag and felt her fingertips brush her blonde Hannah wig. It was now or never.

"No. I mean, I think we should…say what we have to say…at the same time." Lilly was really on the verge of tears now, and forming a sentence was growing difficult. She knew that if she didn't tell Miley now, she would burst into tears.

Miley inhaled deeply. "Okay, Lilly. But I just want you to know that I'll always be your friend, no matter what." Miley swallowed hard.

Lilly nodded.

"Okay…ready?" Miley squeezed Lilly's hand, then let go.

"I love you." Lilly blurted suddenly, squeezing her eyes shut.

"I'm…Hannah Montana." Miley pulled on the blonde wig.

There was shocked silence between the two girls. Both of their biggest secrets were now out in the open. Neither of them could think of anything to say.

"You…love me?" Miley said cautiously, staring into Lilly's eyes. They were filled with emotions—shame, hurt, surprise, and, yes, love.

"Yeah, I-I've known for months that I love…Miley."

Miley looked confused. "I am Miley."

Lilly shook her head. "You're Miley _and_ Hannah. I just don't know if I can deal with that." Lilly was suddenly standing up. Miley reached out to touch her, but the other girl backed away.

"I, uh, I need to think for a while. Sorry Miles." Lilly walked out the door, trying to hide the fact that she was wiping her eyes.

Miley pulled the Hannah wig off her head. She stared at it disgustedly for a few moments, then threw it on the floor and ran upstairs.


	2. two

_**A/N**- Well, as you can see, chapter 2 is up. I promise to update and add ch. 3 as soon as I think of an ending...Anyway, R&R and enjoy._

The next week, school was predictably awkward. Lilly avoided Miley as best she could, favoring the skater crowd and, occasionally, Oliver. Miley had trouble concentrating, and failed a science test.

It was late afternoon on Thursday when Miley decided to take a walk on the beach. She had done this with Lilly many times, and walking alone felt strange somehow. The sun was slowly beginning to sink into the horizon, and Miley knew she had to be getting home soon. As she turned to walk back in the direction she had come, she saw her.

Lilly was sitting on the beach, knees hugged to her chest. She was simply staring out at the water, unmoving. When Miley approached her, Lilly didn't speak or even turn her head.

"Lil?" Miley stood next to the seated blonde. Lilly didn't move away, so Miley sat down beside her.

Lilly suddenly seemed to break her trance. "What do you want?" Her voice was bitter, and her cold, charcoal-rimmed eyes avoided Miley's.

"Look at me, Lilly."

Lilly shook her head. "I don't even know you anymore."

"Lilly, I thought you would accept me when I told you I was Hannah Montana. The Lilly I know wouldn't—"

"Yeah, well, maybe you don't know me as well as you thought." Lilly was on her feet.

Miley quickly stood up also. "Will you just let me finish!" For the first time, Lilly heard anger in Miley's voice. "The Lilly I know would love me no matter what."

Lilly folded her arms. "The Miley I thought I knew would have told me that she was Hannah Montana. You lied to me, Miley. I can't—"

"Would the Miley you thought you knew have done this?" Miley's voice was shaky, desperate. Her hands flew to the blonde girl's waist, pulling her in for a rough kiss.

It was the worst kiss of either girl's life. Whatever love existed between them was masked by anger. Instead of melting into the kiss, Lilly remained stiff and unresponsive. Eventually, Miley pulled away. She looked at Lilly hopefully.

The last rays of sunlight over Malibu were disappearing by the second. Lilly took several steps away from Miley, and wiped her mouth with the back of her sleeve.

When Lilly finally spoke, her voice was icy. "I don't love you, Miley. Not anymore." She turned and ran, once again leaving Miley alone.


	3. three

_A/N- I found an ending for this sooner than I thought I would. My inspo was a flower shop that I walked by this morning. There was a bunch of lilies in the window, and something clicked. This chapter is a little longer and changes POV a bit more. Hope you like my ending! -xoxo, s  
_

The moon was full and bright, and the air was cool with a hint of a breeze. Miley was sitting on her back porch, her guitar in her hands. She was trying to comfort herself with music, something that had always worked when she was little. But not today.

All Miley could think about was Lilly. Her smile, her laugh, her sparkling eyes. Lilly had been her best friend since Miley had arrived from Tennessee three years ago. Miley smiled, remembering how Lilly was the first person to befriend the shy country girl. They had been different in so many ways, but that only made their friendship stronger.

Miley didn't know exactly when she had fallen in love with Lilly. She just knew that for as long as she had remembered, she had wished that Lilly wanted to be more than friends. When Lilly had finally admitted that she loved Miley, Miley had ruined their friendship by revealing that she was Hannah Montana.

Miley looked up at the millions of stars twinkling in the clear, black sky. She remembered how she and Lilly used to lay on the beach together, gazing at the stars. Miley closed her eyes tightly, trying to forget. But she couldn't forget Lilly.

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Lilly sat on the edge of her bed. In her hands was a framed photograph of her and Miley, taken only a few months after they had first met. Miley's arms were around Lilly's shoulders, and both girls were smiling. Lilly blinked back tears as she remembered the day she saw Miley for the first time. The brunette had looked lonely and sad, and Lilly immediately had fallen in love with her Southern twang and sweet smile.

Lilly didn't hate Miley because she was Hannah Montana. Lilly hated herself for loving Miley. Somewhere deep inside her, Lilly knew it wasn't normal to love other girls. Every time she looked Miley, she wanted to kiss those perfect lips, and run her fingers through that soft, chocolate-colored hair. Lilly couldn't handle it anymore.

Lilly caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror. The mischievous glint had vanished from her eyes, and the playful smile that usually danced on her lips was gone.

_Why am I doing this to myself?_ Lilly thought, running her fingers over the picture. _I might be a lesbian freak. But Miley will always love me—just the way I am._

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The next day at school, Lilly tried to find Miley, but their schedules were completely different, so their paths didn't cross once. Lilly tried to focus on Algebra II and Modern Literature, but she couldn't get Miley out of her head.

Between gym and Biology, Lilly's locker got stuck. She moaned in frustration as she tried to turn the immovable dial. The bell rang, and the halls slowly emptied. Lilly knew she would be late for class, but she didn't dare show up without her books. In one final effort, Lilly punched her locker as hard as she could. To her surprise, the door immediately sprang open.

Her books were stacked in the middle of her locker. She started to grab her bio book, which was, of course, at the bottom. That's when she noticed that, on top of her books, there was a single white lily. It was slightly wilted, but still beautiful. Lilly held the fragile flower in her hands, running her fingers over its soft petals and smelling its sweet perfume.

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Miley was doing her homework on her couch. She chewed on her pencil eraser as she stared down at her math homework. Lilly flickered in and out of her mind. Miley willed herself to think about algebra, but her mind was somewhere else.

Suddenly, Miley heard the familiar sound of skateboard wheels rolling into her living room. Miley looked up. Lilly was wearing her helmet and knee pads, and she was holding the lily in her hands.

Miley's heart leapt. She had left the flower in Lilly's locker in a last attempt at winning back her best friend. Could it have worked?

Lilly stood a few feet away from the couch. She looked at the blossom in her hands, and then at Miley. Miley nodded, silently confirming that it was she who had slipped the lily into the blonde girl's locker.

"Miley, w-what are we doing?" Lilly's voice shook. Her eyes were gleaming, and they were no longer full of hate and anger. Still, Lilly looked uncertain and anxious.

Miley slowly stood up and moved toward Lilly. The other girl didn't step back when Miley approached her. Rather, she took a step forward so that she and Miley were almost touching.

"Lilly, I'm sorry I hurt you." Miley tentatively reached out to stroke Lilly's arm. Lilly looked down at Miley's hand, then looked up into the brunette's eyes.

"Miley, I'm the one who…I overreacted. But it was because I…" Lilly bit her lip and looked at the ceiling before she continued. "It was because I was scared of being in love with you."

Miley wordlessly leaned in and kissed Lilly on the lips. This time it was gentle and loving, not harsh and desperate. Miley slipped her arms around Lilly's waist, and Lilly's hands stroked Miley's hair.

Miley was the one who broke the kiss. Her eyes locked with Lilly's. "One more thing."

Lilly brushed the side of Miley's face. "Yeah?"

Miley bit her lip. "Are you sure you're okay with me being Hannah?"

Lilly leaned closer so that her mouth was next to Miley's ear. The other girl shivered as she felt Lilly's hot breath on her neck. When she finally spoke, it was in a whisper that sent chills up and down Miley's spine.

"I guess I'll just have to learn to love Hannah, too." And with that, Lilly's lips captured Miley's once again.


End file.
